December 15, 2004

I still don't get used to this thing called "parenting"
by Liza Sabater

So we promised our kids we'd get them an XBox. I saw plenty of boxes stocked just a couple of weeks ago at the stores. My gatherer instinct told me, "GET IT NOW". What did I do? I listened to the resident hunter. "I'll do it soon", he said, "there is time."

Time my ass.

Now there is not one to be had. NONE!

Good thing that, as a good pagan heathen who enjoys the fanfare of christmas, I've decided to stick with the tried and true Puerto Rican celebration of los tres reyes magos. At least I can tell the kids old king Claus wont be delivering because the box is coming from Oriente. I just hope those three magis on horses make it on time because the blonde guy from the north pole is almost certainly not going to deliver.

Amazon.com: Computer & Video Games: Microsoft's 2004 Holiday Bundle With 2 FREE games and 2 Months of XB Live FREE

Now, a lot of you may be shocked that we've decided to go with a Microsoft appliance given the sometimes vitriolic nature of my rants against the tech giant. Well, I do have rants about monopolies in general --educational, technological or even cultural.

In the case of Microsoft and it's XBox, you can't deny their features kick ass. I particularly like the fact it can also play music CDs and video DVDs; saving us the headache of buying another appliance.

Yep, we're consolidating all our media appliances. Next move is to get an iPod and some Bose speakers. That'll be our "stereo" system ---we already listen to radio only over the net. All I hope is for Apple or any of their 3rd party hardware developers to come out with a satellite radio peripheral. That would not just be convenient but totally wicked.

As you can read, I'm a total gadget slut. Will hook for gadgets ... well, not really. Maybe if your Steve Jobs ... or, of course, Viggo.

As to other options, the PlayStation 2 System also can play CDs and DVDs. We're sticking to the XBox by pure word of mouth. Some gaming friends of ours just love the graphics on the XBox. The #1 reason why I am not allowing a PS2 in the house is due to its censorship technology. What really weirded me out was the little known fact that, to show R-rated movies, you have to opt into the system through a password of your own. Once that password is set, if you forget it or loose it, you cannot reset the box; rendering it a piece of aluminum encased trapezoidal crap.

I don't know you, but I find that absolutely offensive.

So let it be known that I am an awful parent due to my retarded consumeristic instincts. I'll try to find redemption Friday morning by queing in front of BestBuys on 23rd Street; hoping to grab one of the last XBox on the planet. To further my consumeristic flogging, I will then procure the likes of Spider-Man 2: The Movie 2 and SpongeBob SquarePants: The Battle for Bikini Bottom.

Halo 2 did not make the cut thanks to Red Vs Blue; who have spoiled our future blasting away of aliens with their snarky dialogues and irreverent humor. Man, I can't look at Halo and not think of Sarge and just burst out laughing.

I may buy myself super-human qualities with the likes of Tony Hawk Pro Skater 4. To the chillins of this household Tony is god. Bringing the game home will make me at least a divine creature.

Anyhow, if I do not succeed, Santa will suck and the Reyes Magos will be the coolest christmas gift-giving metaphors for years to come.

Hmmm.

More power to la raza?

Maybe not getting the Xbox now is not that bad an idea after all.

Posted by Liza Sabater in Games, Hardware, Life, Microsoft, Technology
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