June 11, 2005

HAPPY PRIDE EVERYBODY!!!!
by Jeff Langstraat

I just got home from Boston's Gay Pride Parade. I LOVE Pride parades. Where else could you see military fetishism (both sexual and nationalistic) camped up to the point where you have a gay rifle drill team performing routines you won't see in boot camp followed by a sea of Unitarians. Or a good Irish pol in his tan suit (girl, that had to be hot) following drag queens on roller skates. Or a leather bear couple carrying a sign saying "Married 1 Year."

I got to the parade route just as the just as the roar of motorcycles filled Copley Square. The Dykes on Bikes were ready, and so was the crowd. A cheer to match the volume of the motorcycles arose from those assembled. It always makes the hair on my arms and legs stand on end. And then it starts. My favorite among the leaders was a straight couple--she driving, he holding on from the back seat--with a "Straight but not narrow" sign on the windshield.

Then it was the Mayor, Grand Marshalls and assorted dignitaries. Mumbles Menino is running for re-election as Boston's Mayor. There were no Menino campaign buttons, signs or marchers anywhere. Tommy doesn't necessarily need them in the parade-he earned a lot of political capital with Boston's gay community when he refused to march in the South Boston St. Patrick's Day Parade because of it's exclusion of an Irish queer group. He hasn't marched in it sense. A generation ago, such a move of defiance against the Boston Irish machine would have been death; Menino, even though facing a challenge from City Councilwoman Maura Hennigan (who also had a contingent), will probably cruise to re-election.

It was obviously a city-election year. City council candidates everywhere. Representative Barney Frank marched with GLSEN. Don't recall seeing any other Federal folks--the election's next year, though, so we'll probably be seeing them then. Only one candidate for the Corner Office showed up, Deveal Patrick. One of the people marching with MassEquality is running in a special election to be my Senator. (Her name is Pat Jehlen and she rocks. Toss her some love if you're interested in putting another progressive in the Massachusetts Senate.)

The funniest contingent was obviously the three drag queens in blue leotards with "No Bush" written on them, and plenty of bush flowing from out of them.

Of course, PFLAG was early and well received. Our relationships to our families of origin remain central in our lives, and they remain very difficult. I realize how lucky I am--my parent's will be attending my aunts' wedding with me this fall, have taken to writing letters to people challenging their homophobia, told Republican pollsters that they've left the Party and it will never have their vote as long as it keeps attacking their son, and gone to Pride (they knew more people in the Parade--from their Church group--than I did, and Mom only said, "Oh, my" three times--she missed the leather float with a guy covered in duct tape, or it probably would have been four). I know too many people whose relationships with their famillies of origin are very difficult, if they exist at all. I've worked with people whose parents cut them out of the family and have refused to speak with them for over a decade; one of my students was thrown out of his house; an acquaintance of mine is not allowed to be in the room alone with his neices and nephews, all because they're gay...that's why PFLAG always receives the response it does, and why I get choked up when they walk by

The other group that always gets that response is the high school groups. BAGLY was marking its twenty-fifth Pride parade. When I came out in the early 90s (in central Iowa) that was unimaginable. In many places it still is. I know where I was in high school, and coming out would not have been an option.

That's one of the things that stands out for me this year. We've made so much progress. One of the happiest contingents today was the people marching with MassEquality, the folks leading the fight to retain marriage equality in Massachusetts (toss 'em some love, we've got to fight off our own constitutional amendment this fall). Their marchers were married couples with signs saying "Together __ Years; Married ____". The last couple in the group was a pair of older men carrying a sign saying "Together 50 years, Married 1 Year." I remember seeing that same couple during the ConCon last year, and my students all going "aaawwwww" when they saw the two of them at the State House. (I just want to toss in a link here to something I wrote after going to Cambridge City Hall when marriage equality was finally realized in the Bay State.)

Gay Pride celebrations are only 35 years old. The first was held in 1970 to commemorate the Stonewall riots. Today's Parade reminds me of how far we've come in that time. A person next to me said to one of his friends, "When I first came out, we used to get beaten up by the police" as a contingent of queer cops walked by.

Inevitably, people ask "why be proud?" Why be proud of who you're attracted to, of how you have sex. Well, if you're really skilled at providing sexual pleasure to a partner, I'd say that's reason to be proud, but that's not the bigger issue. I'm proud because of the progress I just mentioned, progress driven by the actions of people in my communities. I'm proud because our communities have created vibrant cultures. I'm proud when I see the caring communities we've created, when our families of origin rejected us and the larger society left us to die. I'm proud because of the families we've been able to build, and not just the married or long-term couples, but also our families of choice (there is much to be learned from our experimentation with family life). I'm proud because we've not only survived, we've flourished. I am proud to be a Queer American!

These are odd times to be queer in America. It's been less than a year since W won re-election with an anti-gay campaign engineered by closeted gay men (Mehlman, Gurley...). Anti-gay ballot initiatives continue to be passed. The theofascisti in the anti-gay industry have taken this as a sign to push their agenda even harder, and W's administration is helping them out. Still, Connecticut recently enacted Civil Unions. States, localities, and businesses continue to add sexual orientation to their anti-discrimination statues and policies. It might just be the best and worst of times for queer folks.

I'm optimistic, though. That may be because I live in Boston. It's true, we've got it o.k. here in the Bay State....there's a reason they also call us the "Gay State." Somebody's got to lead the way. Nationally, in the short term, we're gonna keep getting our asses kicked, while also winning a few battles along the way. Long-term, though, we're gonna win....I know it in my bones. We've already come further since I came out than I thought we would in my life time. Maybe it's wishful thinking. Maybe I should remember what Cornell West says, looking at history won't allow for optimism, but he remains a "prisoner of hope." (I don't want to escape.)

I'm gonna close with something I've used in other writings. It's part of the closing monologue from Angels in America. Kushner's humanism in this play, which tempers anger at the villains, never fails to amaze me. It's something that inspires me, and nothing in that play is more inspirational on this day than that monologue:

This disease will be the end of many of us, but not nearly all, and the dead will be commemorated and will struggle on with the living, and we are not going away. We won't die secret deaths anymore. The world only spins forward. We will be citizens. The time has come.

Bye Now.

You are fabulous creatures, each and every one.

And I bless you: More Life.

The Great Work Begins

Posted by in Civil Rights, Culture War, Gay, Lesbian, Transgender, History, Queer, Sexual Politics
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Found inJune 12, 2005 09:22 AM

Say it loud, say it proud!