sponge baths

As the Patriot Acts: Episode 8




As the Patriot Acts: An Episodic Adventure in Americanism
Rabid Fiction by Tara Parks
Episode 8: Rhinestoned Recycables

(This dramatic episode opens on a bright and warm heavenly runway. President Ford descends the steps of the Afterlife Air Force One. James Brown waits to greet him. President Ford trips and falls to the ground.)

James: Get up! Get on up!

Gerry: Ohhh…where am I?

James: Your soul is full of soul and we got to roll. What took you so long? I been waitin’ since Christmas for you to get here. Ha! (spins)

Gerry: I had to talk to Saint Peter about my remarks to NYC. Of course, he was going to let me in anyway, but I still had a lot of explaining to do. Apparently, he’s a Knicks fan.

James: Well dust yourself off, my man. We got to get you some rhinestones or something. Can’t meet Jesus wearin’ polyester.

Gerry: Seems a bit strang...you helping me through the afterlife.

James: Ain’t no thing but a chicken wing. You know I supported Richard Nixon, ha! Besides, class and race ain’t suppose to matter so much up here, though some people hold onto all that. Oh, take this manly advice: Steer clear of J Edgar Hoover.


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I have been inundated with these annoying, anonymous chain e-mails stating that Whitefolk are trying to sabotage Jamie Foxx's upcoming music show because he refused to put token white performers on the roster. And to foil the success of his show due to his insolent Black pride, they've purposely put him up against 'American Idol'. Is this true? Was Foxx acting with conviction or with racial malice? And regardless, so what? After all, of all the things to clog up my inbox with, why moral outrage regarding a televised music show, of the kind that Blackfolk have been disproportionately visible for years? Why is this what people have chosen to be up in arms about and leveraging the Internet to advocate for versus, say, Darfur, Haiti, Katrina, political corruption, corporate greed, the fight for a living wage, etc., etc.?

Regardless of where you come down on any of these issues, it is quite revealing how and why people respond to media-amplified and -skewed issues -- particularly when laced with race.

Do I think folks are kinda missing the point when they choose to carelessly and thoughtlessly forward unsubstantiated information about something as benign as a televised music show? Absolutely. But as my grandmother always used to posit: "If you're Black and not paranoid, you're crazy."


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