I need to get this off my chest before I go on to write about your new movie, The Wolfman. Yes I liked the movie and highly recommend it; but I still want to smack you upside the head.

I love you baby, but who the fuck do you think you are?

You are playing a 19th Century, British-born but upper-class New York City raised SHAKESPEARIAN ACTOR and when you open your mouth you gave us Pennsylvania? Hay que tener cojones to pull such an arrogant stunt. And no, I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF LON CHANEY DID THE ORIGINAL IN AN AMERICAN ACCENT. He still sounded mildly waspy, which is what you failed to at least nail.

I can't even ...

How in the hell do you go into a role like that without asking yourself WWRJD? If the answer to "What Would Raul Julia Do?" is that he wouldn't be caught dead playing a 19th century Shakespearian actor with nary a Britishy accent, then ¡cojones! that's exactly what you have to do.

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It is amazing to me that racist, bigoted, xenophobic creeps like David North and Mark Krikorian are taken seriously enough in this country to have their hatred spewed across publications like The New York Times or prime-time news shows. Here's a prime example, just published at the Wonk Rom's Mark Krikorian: ‘Haiti’s So Screwed Up Because It Wasn’t Colonized Long Enough’:

CIS Fellow David North has attacked the idea of waiving TPS fees for Haitian “illegals” who are probably struggling to send every extra penny they have back home right now. Last week North suggested that Haitian refugees would be best culturally absorbed by other Caribbean countries and any refugees accepted by the U.S. should be directed to Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Islands, which according to North, “have never lifted a finger to help America to resettle refugees.”

I can't even begin with this one! Is this man serious? Whatever happened a lot of those Cubans who left after Castro or during the Mariel crisis? Oh right, they ended up in Puerto Rico. And how about all the Haitians that took to boats and dingies after the fall of Duvalier? Puerto Rico, of course!

The United States actually had thousand of Haitians in immigration limbo and human rights abuse hell during the 1980s after putting them into an internment camp in Fort Allen, one of the oldest military bases in the island. And guess who got to keep all those Marielitos and Haitians during one of the worst recessions we had on the island? Why, of course, Puerto Rico!

It gets better though,


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Why doesn't it shock me that PETA goes out of their way to deceptively leech Benicio del Toro's celebrity status for their own screwed up extremist agenda? This is what Primera Hora is reporting in Puerto Rico.

Here's what happened: Last week PETA released a letter that was allegedly penned by Benicio del Toro and address to the governor of Puerto Rico Luis Fortuño. In the letter Benicio supposedly urges the governor to block the company Bioculture from building a primate farm in Guayama. The letter goes on to say that he would even join the mayor of Guayama in any civil disobedience efforts that would help stop the project.

Oh boy.

Primera Hora has his father, Gustavo del Toro, go on record to do damage control. He explained PETA's announcement of the letter came as a surprise to them. PETA not only failed to present this letter to Benicio as a petition that he co-signed, they also lied about Benicio's penning the letter in the first place. Even worse is the fact that the "letter" makes it look like Del Toro is willing to do any civil disobedience actions to stop the construction. Last but not least, the timing of this letter was suspect. The original letter Benicio signed was dated September 2nd. His father says that had he been asked two signed any statement two weeks ago (when Fortuño threw the island's economic crisis into a tailspin by laying off 17,000 workers), he would not have signed the petition.

Even though I am for the ethical treatment of animals, I am absolutely opposed to the work of PETA. It's not just for their twisted janseist mission that says even cockroaches have rights, but for the mysoginistic and exploitative PR tactics that it uses to line it's coffers. I rarely use the word "hate" for advocacy organization but PETA's shameless famewhoring puts them up there with extremists like Limbaugh, Coulter, Malkin and Beck.

'Tis why I was gearing up for an ambiguous smackdown of Benicio del Toro. Ambiguous because well ... you know how bad my enchule for that papi is. Yet I couldn't believe he would fall for PETA's shameless PR stunts. I find the idea of a monkey farm distasteful and, heck, even the name of a company like "Bioculture" is all sorts of wrong. But, ñeta, Benicio's brother is a pediatric oncologist. I find it hard to believe he is completely opposed to vivisection.

Sure enough, Benicio fell for PETA stunts. This from a man who says he's not from Hollywood and by inference not prone to falling for the trappings of celebrities. Yet he's done what every other celebrity that's gone to bat for them done, even overlooking the fact that they euthanizes more the 20,000 puppies and kittens and all sorts of animals a yearas the "humane" way to care for them.

Which makes for a great "teachable" moment: PETA has turned misogyny, pornography and "star fucking" into a dubious art form. Do celebrities really want to be attached to that? The people behind PETA are extremists who've mastered the art of leeching social capital from celebrities for their 15 minutes of publicity. Do celebrities really need t flock to them like flies to excrement?

The answer, of course, is NO.

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From the Wikipedia entry:

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I've never seen this episode (I grew up in Puerto Rico and this show was never broadcasted in our market). I've never been sure how I feel about Sandford and Son in general. Now it's complicated with the Puerto Ricans in the mix.

Part 1

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Today is Puerto Rican Pride Day here in NYC. Long time readers already now that I am actually quite averse at going to the parade but that doesn't stop me from wanting to celebrate the day in one way or another. So today I felt the need to get a list of the top tale tell signs of a Puerto Rican:

10. You speak of "La Isla" to point to anywhere in the island (including islands of Vieques and Culebra) that is not the San Juan metro area.

9. Your eyes will get misty at the thought of "asaltos navideños", "fiestas patronales", "Viernes Santo" or "Día de Reyes". Extra points if you lost your virginity at the Old San Juan's "Fiestas de San Sebastian", Loíza's "Fiestas de San Patricio" or Hatillo's "Día de los Inocentes".

8. You have camphor oil, Vick's and Robbitussin in your medicine cabinet along with Dr. Scott's cod liver oil pills and Agua Maravilla.

7. You don't go to mass but once in a while sneak into a church for some holy water.

6. You may not be a believer but there's someone in your family who is a "medium unidad" or has had their "santo hecho". Extra points if you know which is your "orisha" or which dead relative haunts you.

5. Chancletas may still be considered more of a discipline tool than the preferred footware for the beach.

4. You're mouth gets all watery when you hear such words as "cola champagne", "sangría de Fido", "Kasalta" or "pinchos".

3. There is a sign in your favorite lunch spot that says, "No politics or religion discussion allowed in this establishment".

2. When a guy walking down the street and tells you he can sell you a "café con leche", you know he is not offering you a latte.

and #1 is ...
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