Congressman Joe Barton (R-CD6) uses SCHIP to audition for The Simpsons?

O. M. F. G. This is really awesome.

I direct you to the latest press release coming from the government run and financed website for the Committee on Energy and Commerce Republicans. It seems that Congressman Joe Barton has a hyperactive funny bone and since the SCHIP debacle broke out, he's been using the website as a place to issue his one-man smackdowns to any and all supporters of SCHIP.

Joe Barton uses The Simpsons for SCHIP-bashing: Republicans using their goernment websites for snarky purposes. Cool!

Here's the link to the first one I noticed, The ‘C’ in SCHIP Is for Children, Except When It’s Not. Today Mr. Barton issued a new release, Bipartisanship on SCHIP!. This one will go down into the annals of the US Congress history as not only an excellent example of Fair Use (something a lot of Republicans stand against), and the First Amendment, but it stands are proof positive that those stodgy conservatives are hip to the popculty times.

Starring "Republican" businessman Montgomery Burns and "Democrat" Mayor Joe Quimby, the press release goes on to depict how the bill is not about the kids but all about the greed. A bipartisan greed that, by the way, is aided an abetted by MoveOn.org and the head of the Democratic Caucus, Rahm Emanuel.

I. Kid. You. Not.

WTF!

The full bipartisan greedy fun after the jump :

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Republican businessman Montgomery Burns today joined with Mayor Joe Quimby, D-Springfield, to support the Senate’s gazillion-dollar SCHIP bill.

“If the poor children can get a piece of the action, why can’t I?” explained Burns at a MoveOn.org rally in Capital City. “The little darlings are needy? Me, too. I need somebody to pay. Quimby here says he knows a bunch of low-income nobodies who are ripe for the picking. Excellent.”

“You need this?” wondered the mayor. “Well, why not. I’ve got needs, too. Why, I’ve got 27 paternity suits pending and to quote the Speaker, ‘suffer the little children.’ The Quimby Compound is overflowing with those little sufferers. Vote Quimby.”

Inexplicably, the mayor then leaned toward a comely MoveOn organizer and whispered in her ear, “Ah, if anyone asks, you’re my niece from out of town and you don’t get SCHIP.”

“But Uncle Joe, I am your niece from out of town, and I do get SCHIP.”

“Good Lord, I’m a monster!” exclaimed the mayor.

Mr. Burns shrugged and pressed on with a stirring call to arms: “Truth and fairness, these are the demons we must slay if we wish to save the tykes.”

His patience was tested when a ruckus arose from a restive crowd of backdrop-toddlers who’d been rented by MoveOn for the photo-op. “Get these props away from me,” Burns hissed.

“Kids? Who needs ‘em? Rahm, release the hounds!” added Quimby with a spreading grin. “Ha, I’ve always wanted to say that, Burns.”

The 37 rental children fled and were not seen again, but the arf-arf-arfing of their pursuers could be heard well past sunset.

*Actual facts and events may vary, but really, how much?
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