Why women lost to Hillary Clinton last night
Hillary Clinton squandered last night the opportunity of a lifetime.
She could have taken that moment to praise her supporters, praised Barack Obama as the rightful nominee of the Democratic Party and put herself as the bridge builder who would bring party unity to the convention floor in Denver and Obama as the new President of the United States in November.
Hillary Clinton had the opportunity to become a sheroe on her last 5 minutes as candidate for the nomination. She had the opportunity to become a larger than life figure, and example of resilience, smart, wit and grace under pressure.
Instead she chose to be the The Bitch.
Bitches have some or all of the following characteristics.
1) Personality. Bitches are aggressive, assertive, domineering, overbearing, strong-minded, spiteful, hostile, direct, blunt, candid, obnoxious, thick-skinned, hard-headed, vicious, dogmatic, competent, competitive, pushey, loud-mouthed, independent, stubborn, demanding, manipulative, egoistic, driven, achieving, overwhelming, threatning, scarey, ambitious, tough, brassy, masculine, boisterous, and turbulent. Among other things . A Bitch occupies a lot of psychological space. You always know she is around. A Bitch takes shit from no one. You may not like her, but you cannot ignore her.
2) Physical. Bitches are big, tall, strong, large, loud, brash, harsh, awkward, clumsy, sprawling, strident, ugly. Bitches move their bodies freely rather than restrain, refine and confine their motions in the proper feminine manner. They clomp up stairs, stride when they walk and don't worry about where they put their legs when they sit. They have loud voices and often use them. Bitches are not pretty.
3) Orientation. Bitches seek their identity strictly thru themselves and what they do. They are subjects, not objects. They may have a relationship with a person or organization, but they never marry anyone or anything; man, mansion, or movement. Thus Bitches prefer to plan their own lives rather than live from day to day, action to action, or person to person. They are independent cusses and believe they are capable of doing anything they damn well want to. If something gets in their way; well, that's why they become Bitches. If they are professionally inclined, they will seek careers and have no fear of competing with anyone. If not professionally inclined, they still seek self-expression and self-actualization. Whatever they do, they want an active role and are frequently perceived as domineering. Often they do dominate other people when roles are not available to them which more creatively sublimate their energies and utilize their capabilities. More often they are accused of domineering when doing what would be considered natural by a man.
Whether feminists like it or not, anybody who "occupies a lot of psychological space" is just absolutely not fit to be president of anything. Especially president of a country like the United States, which has been mired in the Oedipal psychodrama of the neo-cons who gave both Bushes and the first Clinton presidency.
The Bitch uses the power of psychological violence to make every single event be about her, of who she is and how she feels about everything and everybody, especially those who refuse to subjugate themselves to her needs.
To The Bitch anger and resentment are what feed her soul. The Bitch is not Beautiful. The Bitch is angry, vindictive, petty and in a perpetual state of scorn.
The Bitch is a woman slighted, a woman who was once The Victim but now with sheer psychological violence she's risen to the top.
The Bitch will never be The Victim again. And it's this fear that ironically keeps her in the perpetual road to recovery from her victimhood. The Bitch is The Victim on perpetual payback mode.
The Bitch's greatest achievement, indeed is The Payback.
Everybody who has ever tried to not grant her all she wishes is an enemy of her state of perpetual bitchitude. The Bitch is indeed an equal opportunity offender. She is not just Better Than Man because she is a woman. She is better than man because she The Bitch. She is better than all women because she has the maleness, the anger and the power of violence that other women don't have.
The Bitch is above being woman because to her, Woman is synonymous to Weak. And it's that thought of being Weak that she happily uses to fuel the Anger and Violence that are at the core of her being.
Hillary Clinton chose to be The Bitch last night with her boastful non-victory speech; by waving into the world's face the imaginary 18 million voters who will remain silent without her command.
It was indeed an act of violence intended to formally claim her entitlement to occupy as much psychological space as she could muster in her psychological war against The Party of Change.
Hillary Clinton did a huge disservice to women last night by not accepting to go heroically into the night and by basically proving to misogynists all around the world that there are only two choices for a woman : to be The Bitch or to be the The Victim.
Hillary Clinton had the opportunity of a lifetime to show the world that women do have a third and a fourth and a million different options that have nothing to do with either violence or weakness.
Hillary Clinton didn't rise to the occasion and for that matter all women last night lost the opportunity of a lifetime.
This post was updated and cross-posted at Booman Tribune
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Entitlement | Privilege | Stereotypes | Womanhood | 2008 Presidential Elections | Democratic Party | Hillary Clinton | Primaries
Obama is going to be another 4 years of Bush?
Submitted by liza on 4 June 2008 - 12:43pm.
What kind of illogical crap is that?
It defies logic to say something like that and this is what makes The Bitch powerful ---her wins have nothing to do with reason or logic but with wearing people down psychologically with their mind games.
It's just outrageous.
Oh, and save yourself the condescension, please. I should have added that The Bitch never lays claim on her ruin --it's always someone else's fault.
You're a classic Bitch enabler.
why women lost
Submitted by priscianus jr (not verified) on 4 June 2008 - 7:42pm.
Liza,
I came over here because I was curious to read what was scrubbed from BooMan.
Well, as far as I'm concerned you're just being honest, perceptive, and courageous. The great Drama Queen of American politics needs no comment from me right now. Like so many others, I have been appalled by her campaign. But -- and I myself was surprised by this -- last night it hit me on a deeply emotional level. It was like, Oh my God, this woman is never going away. I was really upset this morning, depressed, and scared for the future. (I have three small children.) Okay, I could rant about this for a long time, I'll spare you. Just want to thank you, because you said it all. To some people, maybe you need to be apologetic, but to many people, you definitely do not.
You know what. I think there are a lot more sane than insane people in the D party. I'm gratified to see that most Dems do understand the need for this lady of uncharted ego to get out of our face.
And what you said -- well it's mild compared to what my wife thinks, or my late mother in law -- and that at a time when I still didn't see it.
Her actions are Shakespearean in proportion
Submitted by liza on 5 June 2008 - 11:01pm.
Whenever you think she's going to redeem herself, boom! There's another new low she's discover. She's like a political spelunker; there's no abyss she's afraid to plumb --as long as she gets to choose she's not just right, but that she's "the boss" that can get away with doing things only on her terms.
It really is all about her and that's what's so disappointing. Everybody else are just pawns.
Good Work
Submitted by Oscar In Louisville (not verified) on 4 June 2008 - 8:36pm.
Excellent, thought-provoking post. I hadn't really thought much about the nature of The Bitch, but I know a good number of men and women that fit the profile. Definitely something to think about. Thanks.
Have you read "The Artists Way" by Julia Cameron?
Submitted by liza on 5 June 2008 - 11:24pm.
She has quite a number of categories for toxic people and the one the Clintons and the Clintonistas reminded me of was the "Crazy Maker".
thanks for writing this.
Submitted by northanger (not verified) on 4 June 2008 - 10:51pm.
hey liza. i'm not going to repeat what i wrote here, but did want to point out that Irene Claremont de Castillejo's Knowing Woman: A Feminine Psychology has chapters titled Man the hero, The Rainmaker Ideal & The older woman. her book begins with a question: Is it exhausting to listen and talk to people all day? She realizes "that the question was not one of fatigue or lack of fatigue, but rather of fatigue or refreshment". i think it would've been heroic if Clinton provided refreshment last night. we're all so fatigued.
don't know whether sheroe fits with the Rainmaker Ideal. that chapter begins with the Dalai Lama escaping Tibet. almost miraculously, the mountains were shrouded in mist. de Castillejo writes about the apparent power of lamas to influence the weather & says: Rainmakers are very inconspicuous... Indeed, these rare people around whom life blossoms can't be said to cause the blossoming. The Rainmaker of the story did not cause the rain to fall by the exercise of any supernatural power. Nor I am sure would the Dalai Lam claim that he had caused the shrouding mist to which he owed his escape. The Rainmaker does not cause, he allows the rain to fall... We have forgotten how to allow. The essence of the Rainmaker is that he knows how to allow... Whether he knows it or not his own receptive allowing will affect all those around him; rain will fall on the parched fields, and tears will turn bitter grief to flowering sorrow, while stricken children dry their eyes and laugh. There is a vast difference between allowing, and deliberately exerting power.
today they say that the Tibetan exile community is one of the success stories among refugee groups, "By showing how Tibet can exist internally, in spirit and imagination, even if it is barely visible on the map, the Dalai Lama has been suggesting to Palestinians, Kurds and Uighurs that they can maintain a cultural community even if they have lost their territory. Communities can be linked not by common soil so much as by common ground, a common foundation."
i think i understand your point & can see how Clinton failed to expand the political palette for women. she was certainly in a great position to do so last night. to set the stage, to establish the mold for other women to follow & break. maybe because for her winning is everything & no other possibilities exist. imho, if Clinton truly speaks for 17-18 million voters she should have the depth of imagination & psychological character & courage to lead her people to the promised land. even, if like Moses or MLK, she will never reach it herself.
Refreshment! That's it! The
Submitted by liza on 5 June 2008 - 11:08pm.
Refreshment! That's it!
The idea of "The Bitch" caught my eye because I've been thinking of doing again the exercises in "The Artist's Way", the book about unblocking creativity written by Julia Cameron. In it she talks about the soul sucking "crazy makers" that attacks us in ways that calcifies us to openness, hope, creativity and ... wait it for .... change.
There was nothing creative in the way she carried on her campaign and for that matter, t was soul sucking. And then there was what you hit over the head : " for her winning is everything & no other possibilities exist."
That really has been her downfall.
what a juxtaposition
Submitted by northanger (not verified) on 6 June 2008 - 6:04am.
"The Bitch" & "The Artist's Way" juxtaposition......hmm!
found this in Ingniting the Soulfire: Spiritual Dimensions of the Bach Flower Remedies: According to Cameron, crazy-makers 'are those personalities that create storm centres'. Among their behavioural characteristics, she includes their ability to break deals and destroy schedules, discount your reality, spending your time and money in the process. Furthermore, crazy-makers expect special treatment and they are expert blamers who hate order. These individuals are so clever and believable that their appearance into our lives ultimately sets up an internal dialog that blocks our ability to move forward. (also checked out Negotiation: Communication for Diverse Settings: The tactics of this group of difficult people lead others to ask, "Am I crazy? This doesn't seem resonable. I feel pressured to do something I know isn't right." Crazymakers create anxiety and manipulate situations to achieve their goals.)
calcifies us to openness, hope, creativity and ... wait it for .... change (i love this)
i think it describes perfectly the times we're in: folks feel paralyzed, hope is calcified. we have plenty of crazy-makers... we don't need more.
OTHO, Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain by Betty Edwards teaches folks how to unlock their creativity by teaching them techniques (upside-down drawings) to learn how to draw. that book helped me realize that i might not ever be a great artist, but i can draw! she moved drawing from an exclusive activity (having the right genes to draw) to inclusive (anyone can draw).
i see Obama taking (at least) two approaches: {1} decalcifying & {2} igniting? not redrawing but drawing the political map "upside-down". getting folks to vote for the first time in their lives — hope is a vote!
together i think they create what poet Galway Kinnell's calls a syzygial amplexus in The Cellist (from his book of poems called Imperfect Thirst).
I wouldn't put it the way you did but
Submitted by Rick Taylor (not verified) on 5 June 2008 - 12:28am.
I wouldn't put it the way you did but I agree entirely with the sentiment. Sadly, Hillary Clinton missed a golden opportunity to energize and unify the party, burnish her own reputation, and put on the faces of people like me who've grown cynical about her. Now when she finally concedes it will be because her supporters had to take her aside and lay down the law. It really is a pity.
I'd use the word narcissist rather than bitch. Despite her occasional declarations this was about the Democrats, it's always been about her first and foremost. Even on what should have been a big night for the Democrats, it was still about her.
I've used the word narcissist as well because it does apply
Submitted by liza on 5 June 2008 - 11:18pm.
Her non-concession just threw me in a loop. It was just so unnecessarily defiant and just bitchy that it left me wondering, "Is this really how she wants to be remember? Does she really think this is what a strong woman is all about?"
And the theme of the "Bitch is the New Black" has been played up so much in feminism these days that it just ... I think we need to retire the moniker as a symbol of woman strength. It's not. The Bitch is really a weak soul.
Liza is the founder and publisher of http://culturekitchen.com. You can find her personal rants and raves over at http://lizasabater.com
Your arrogance
Submitted by AnotherBitch (not verified) on 5 June 2008 - 12:03pm.
Bush supporters made the same argument you make - that Gore should back down immediately rather than concede a tie election.Because of people (like you) who thought that it was more important to create a "moment" to honor a candidate than to interpret the vote, we ended up with the worst President in modern history. Clinton represents the 18 million people who cast their vote for her, and deserves our respect. This election, as you know, will be decided by the superdelegates as no candidate received the necessary majority of state delegates to receive the nomination. In
Proudly,
Another Bitch
My arrogance?
Submitted by liza on 5 June 2008 - 11:21pm.
Her failed campaign and her lack of grace is my fault?
Whatever.
And for the record, that "18 million voters" meme is bullshit. You know it's a made up number so get over it.
I'm one of the imaginary 18 million voters
Submitted by portia9 (not verified) on 5 June 2008 - 3:06pm.
"Hillary Clinton didn't rise to the occasion and for that matter all women last night lost the opportunity of a lifetime."
I'm curious what opportunity she has supposedly lost? The opportunity to kiss some DNC ass? The opportunity to capitulate? Bah. As a woman, (albeit an imaginary one in your world) I was very proud of her speech. I'm finished with the Democrats and a proud new independent voter. I will never cast a vote for Senator Obama. And no, I won't vote for Senator McCain. I'm no Republican. Neither of these men will do anywhere near as good a job as President as Senator Clinton would have. They will be equally awful, just in different ways. One silver lining: at least with a McCain Presidency I won't be sending even more of my hard earned cash to Washington for them to squabble over and squander.
You are a fool and are betraying Hillay's ideals
Submitted by mole333 on 5 June 2008 - 6:37pm.
You would step back and not support someone who is pro-choice and pro-equality over someone who is anti-choice and anti-equality just because your candidate lost? Boo fucking hoo. Had Hillary won I would have PROUDLY campaigned for her and PROUDLY voted for her just as I proudly voted for her for the Senate. I opted for Obama but I sure as hell would have been happy to see Hillary CLinton as President.
Now you come along with your sour grapes puckering your mouth and tell us you won't support the candidate whose values are 90% the same as Hillary's over the candidate whose values are only 10% the same as Hillary's? That marks you as a first class fool. You would sacrifice you own values and your own self interest for a goddamned hissy fit? To hell with that!
You SHOULD be proud of your support for Hillary. And you have every right to object to Liza's diary. But to abandon all you and Hillary hold dear just out of some childish spite is dumb. D-U-M-B.
You were never a Democrat, a progressive or a feminist
Submitted by liza on 5 June 2008 - 11:28pm.
Because if you were a true feminist, you'd never vote for a guy that would put you in jail for wanting an abortion.
So honestly, you people who say that will vote for McCain were anyway going to do so and supporting Clinton was just a ruse.
Liza/blogdiva - I'm thinking
Liza/blogdiva - I'm thinking you might have some of your described "the Bitch" qualities yourself, just in terms of your commentary and injection of yourself into the Obama-Clinton race.
Really sad. For the record, she already did those things you suggest she "could" or "should" have done: demonstrate strength, leadership, loyalty to the Party platform. It's called a career. Lifetime of work (not a collection of speeches).
The ironic thing with this whole primary race and the political dialogue about "change" - is that fundamental change in the leadership style of this country would have come with a Hillary administration, but the Obama administration will be mirror image of the Bush administration. Head piece. no accountability. no experience. all talk. who will be pulling the strings in an Obama administration?